[ he'll wake up - he's probably not out for long at all. And maybe mostly because of the exhaustion of Justice pulling back and leaving him empty and cold. groaning and rubbing at his face, starting to sit up. ]
He was my friend. We met years ago, when I was with the Wardens. He was impossible to talk to, and frustrating beyond belief, and brave beyond all measure. A true embodiment of a good spirit. True justice is rare in the world, you know. He was the first person to ever hear me talk about the plight of the mages and truly listen.
We agreed we could help each other. He was trapped outside of the Fade, and I was being pressed in on all sides. I needed his power, his abilities, as an escape. And together we could make a stand. Truly, actually help the mages.
But something ... was wrong with me. Inside of me. My anger. My wrath. It twisted him. Whatever we are now is something different. Not quite human, and not quite spirit.
[ He listens. Quietly. Black scrawl pulsing in the same devoid colour as his halo stretch over his shoulders and chest like an abyss, bone-white fangs lining the insides as he does.
... We rarely disagree, you know. It would be easy, to blame him for that action and wash my hands of it. Pretend that I am above such things, such desperation and bloodshed. But I am not. We did what was necessary together.
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...
Anders?
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Yes.
[ as in, yes. it's me. and not the other guy. ]
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Has your head cooled off?
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[ he seems okay, his face definitely got decked by a very strong guy with a great punch so it's not AWESOME but. he's alive. ]
You're lucky. Justice isn't as strong here. He's ripped a Templar's head off his shoulders before.
[ but uh. ]
Not-- That I'd want to do that to you.
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Who?
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[ gesturing at his eyes. ]
I am an abomination. A monster.
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[ Going to open with that first of all even if he looks a bit uncertain about what this is supposed to mean. ]
Is it more magic?
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[ even though he sometimes denies it. the difference between being possessed by a spirit or a demon. ]
Justice is a spirit of the Fade. He embodies an ideal. Or ... he is supposed to.
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[ He's heard of the Fade but he doesn't know much about it. All he's heard of is something called the Nightmare or something. ]
I have sort of heard about it. I might take a guess to what "Justice" is supposed to embody.
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[ so. ]
He was my friend. We met years ago, when I was with the Wardens. He was impossible to talk to, and frustrating beyond belief, and brave beyond all measure. A true embodiment of a good spirit. True justice is rare in the world, you know. He was the first person to ever hear me talk about the plight of the mages and truly listen.
We agreed we could help each other. He was trapped outside of the Fade, and I was being pressed in on all sides. I needed his power, his abilities, as an escape. And together we could make a stand. Truly, actually help the mages.
But something ... was wrong with me. Inside of me. My anger. My wrath. It twisted him. Whatever we are now is something different. Not quite human, and not quite spirit.
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Anger, wrath. It sounds too familiar to him. ]
He had transformed, then?
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We are something new.
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[ go ahead. ]
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... We rarely disagree, you know. It would be easy, to blame him for that action and wash my hands of it. Pretend that I am above such things, such desperation and bloodshed. But I am not. We did what was necessary together.
[ but justice did push. did change and grow. ]
We mostly disagreed on Hawke. My obsession.
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Your obsession?
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I think I've always cared for him more than he cares for me.
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Is he... someone you love?
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Despite my better judgment. Believe me, I've been called pathetic for it more than a few times here already.
[ fish fear me, women HATE my taste in men ]
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It's not pathetic.
[ Fiddling absently with his balled up jacket in his hands. ]
I think, it is not wrong to love who you want to. No matter what people say.
I've... [ One last hesitation. ] ...heard my fair share, of something like that.
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blinking at him for a second, wiping off his nose with the back of a hand. ]
Then they're the nug-for-brains who are wrong. Anyone would be lucky to have you.
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[ Well, he doesn't answer that. ]
I am sorry it came to this.
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[ sincerely. he's grateful. they're only words, but they matter. he wishes he knew what to say to make it better, but he doesn't. ]
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